In this world of the “haves” and the “have nots,” I shouldn’t be surprised by the latest news items. It seems a great many people believe the world owes them a living, and by “the world,” I mean you and me.
Seemingly gone are the days when education and at least a modicum of work – hard or not – would see you fixed up for at least a moderate lifestyle, and the chance for happiness. But apparently not. We have this dangerous congressperson advocating free everything, including the ability to sponge off society for “not being willing to work.” Well now, isn’t that special? How many of us would quite like to live the life of leisure but realize that that’s not going to happen when the electricity gets turned off for non-payment.
Take our latest “nobody-loves-me-everybody-hates-me-think-I’ll-go-and-eat-worms” idiot.
A 27-year-old gent from India, resplendent in a fake beard fashioned from the shavings of a yak – do they have yaks in India? – maintaining that his parents never asked his permission to be conceived and therefore were obliged to support him throughout his life. He is thus taking the matter to court and proposes to sue his poor benighted mum and dad.
He maintains he doesn’t owe his parents anything, after all “I love my parents, and we have a great relationship, but they had me for their joy and their pleasure.” I rather enjoyed his mother’s response: “I must admire my son’s temerity to want to take his parents to court knowing both of us are lawyers.”
On the flip side, we have the one-year-shy-of-a-century grandma in Holland who had a rather unusual entry in her bucket list.
Our Annie, I’m proud to share her name, decided at some point her life she needed but a few things to complete her happiness.
With the help of the local police, she wanted to be arrested and jailed. Seeing this as something their rulebook didn’t quite cover, the coppers decided that if they couldn’t make this jewel happy, what kind of men were they?
I don’t believe it was a SWAT-like situation, but Peter Smit, a lieutenant at the Nijmegen local nickery, obliged and slapping the cuffs on this crimeless nonagenarian and gently, I presume, escorted her to a cell, there to leave her for an indeterminate amount of time – I presume not long.
But long enough for someone – I presume her relatives – to take happy snappies of this glorious woman looking for all the world like she’d won the lottery. The photos show her proudly displaying her handcuffs and laughing up a storm.
The Dutch for “go, grannie, go!”, I believe, is “ga, oma, ga,” while the Hindi for “naff off, you silly bugger” is “tum moorkh moorkh band karo”.
Now who would you rather be? A grumble-bum who couldn’t see joy if it stood up in his porridge and said good morning, or a lovely lady facing the end of her life with all the verve and fun of a 20-year old?
Ga, oma, ga!
Annie Dear lives in Lee’s Summit. Email her at firstname.lastname@example.org.